Keep it positive... Right???

It's currently 2:30 am as i write this. I am wide awake. My pain is higher than it's been. Especially in my now swollen, sometimes burning up sometimes freezing cold, purple blotchy left arm.
I've never been a "normal" RSD ( reflex sympathetic dustrophy for those who don't know) patient. I got it without an injury. Literally it just showing up one day out of no-where. Then i went into remission for 6 lovely years. Then again out of nowhere it reappears. I had my first SCS (spinal cord stimulator) it worked beautifully. Taking most of the agonizing pain away, allowing me to live my life. Then out of nowhere my scs stops working. That level of pain relief to date has never been matched. But!! I was doing good. I was prepared for winter emotionally which meant far better control over my pain. Until 2 weeks ago when i cut my finger. Which has since completely healed barely even a scar. That little cut has left destruction in it's wake. Back to my extremely painful left arm.
When the pain 1st started to intensify i kept using it as normal as I could. However, now it's so painful just to move it. But unlike years and flares before I am much more emotionally prepared. I know it's a flare and through hard work the pain will subside. I just have to push through.
I refuse to let RSD control me. I will work through the emotions not let them work me. I've been down this road before but I'm stronger this time. I've also got the best team on myside. My family is so much more understanding and supportive. My girls help me so much. Raheem has changed and grown so much. He has been my rock these last few weeks (longer than that)he reminds me how strong i am everyday. He believes in me like he never has before. I also have some pretty awesome friends. They let me bitch and complain. They love me even if I don't get to go out often. They keep me company if I'm stuck in bed. Either in person, over the phone or through fb.
I love my family and friends dearly. I know i don't say Thank You nearly enough. But im truly grateful for them all.
I will be posting more. Doing more nail art anything that keeps me busy. So stay tuned you never know what. I'll write about next.